40

Although my name was a popular British choice in the 70s and 80s, I only recently discovered that 'Louise' is an old fashioned name in America. I arrived at a meeting with a group of millennials only to be told that based on my name they were expecting me to be a 90 year old.

To be honest I was more offended that they felt eager to share this information with me. The last time I felt that old was when I walked into a Hollister store with a pushchair. I am on a par with the Betty's and Sylvia's of the world. Which meant turning 40 was a breeze!

I celebrated my birthday enjoying cocktails at a hotel bar, continuing the party in a hotel suite and having complaints made about the loud music - bucking the trend for most people here called 'Louise'.

The following weekend my friends turned their house into a British Pub with the obligatory pool table, darts board and pub quiz. I couldn't have asked for better friends to share my pork scratchings with!

I always imagined that I'd celebrate my 40th surrounded by family and friends I'd grown up with, yet nobody I celebrated with knew me 5 years ago. I feel like I've known so many of my Bay Area friends for longer than that. An expat lifestyle means you deepen friendships very quickly, clinging to people you share a common culture with whilst supporting and being supported by those you don't.

Among many thoughtful gifts and cards sent from the UK was an Emma Bridgewater mug sent by my school/university friend Marc who had my college nickname inscribed on it:

Annie must have noted my happy reaction which might explain her recent Mother's Day card to me:

After Christmas, and to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary, we took the children on a surprise road trip to LA to visit Universal Studios and Disneyland.

It was my first time to Disney as well as the children's so when Minnie offered to give us some advice we were all ears!

My brave boy on Thunder Mountain

A very funny 'try not to laugh moment' was when Annie leaped off the exhilarating 3-D Harry Potter Ride begging to go on again, whilst Dan staggered off looking pale and sweaty, needing to sit down. They've since removed the 3D element from the ride because of "guest nausea" but I still laugh out loud when anyone mentions Hogwarts (sorry Dan).

There were moments we enjoyed it more than the children!

"This stage is about to explode with major piggy power!"

The 40th was a big distraction from the political circus of Trump's inauguration. This is not a united states. I wondered how soon the election would impact the liberal bubble of the Bay Area (in San Mateo County 18% of people voted for Trump). I soon heard that a good friend was unable to risk traveling overseas to visit her poorly mother because she might not be allowed back into the country she has worked in for more than 10 years. Other hard to believe personal stories soon followed. A charity I work with described how the demand for their family homeless shelters (yes, homeless children) has plummeted since November because vulnerable parents are afraid to ask for help due to a fear of deportation.

Annie and I joined the airport protest at SFO in support of a school friends father who was affected by the Muslim ban. It was so powerful to see so many families there - parents teaching their children that fear doesn't win.

Despite being forced to change schools mid-term by our school district, the situation has worked out in our favour, not least because of the positive attitude our children have had in response to change.

So much so that the organisation we considered suing will soon be my new employer as I take on a para-educator role. I've always been one to dig my heels in when I think I know best, but this was a lesson for me in grace. Sometimes when we set aside the urge to make a point and respond with gentleness and optimism we can get the best out of a difficult situation. We won that battle by not fighting it.

Never was this so eloquently demonstrated than during a school fundraiser when Tom got selected as one of five children in the school to throw a cream pie at the head teacher. Check out the video here.

The day before this happened he was the unknown new boy. Now he's the Kinder kid who hit the Principal with squirty cream. That is why the fifth graders high five him when he walks by.

Explaining to the children on a field trip how to safely handle 19th century work tools.

Dressing in Welsh costume for Multi-Cultural Day.

Annie as Charlotte Bronte for her Wax Museum project.

Christi, me, Courtney, Britta and Tanya (Sarah missing) - five amazing Kindergarten Mums who have made the stress of a mid-term school move worth every minute (mainly because they think nothing of drinking alcohol on playdates).

And then, a very long nine months since we last saw them my Dad finally relinquished his free supply of toilet roll by retiring. His last day of paid work (or as he described it, his last ever paid nap) was spent with us in the Californian sunshine!

Fish n chips with a view at Half Moon Bay

Finding balance in Sacramento

The view at 10,000 ft over a breathtaking (literally, taking your breath away it was so cold) Lake Tahoe.

Every time we asked him to blow his runny nose he would politely yell back "no thank you, I like sniffing"

She loves skateboarding, kayaking, roller blading and climbing - this girl has no fear and I wish she got it from me!

Seeing Yosemite for the first time with my parents was very special. I'd always thought it would be a trip that required a log cabin and fishing rod but we stayed in a four star hotel just outside of the park and drove in each day to the valley floor to wander around. It's hard to believe that some of those rocks are more than 10 million years old. It made us all feel very small. 

What beauties!

Turning 40 is a gift. If you've made it this far then you're luckier than some so don't complain about getting older.  Just as I did for my 30th, I've been finding 40 ways to remember my 40th year. As well as meeting Mickey, finally getting my hands on the FIFA World Cup, watching Cold Play at the Levi Stadium, seeing Sting live, finally getting to the Warfield to watch the Specials and meeting two of my favourite British authors, I've eaten dinner with chef Tom Kerridge, got to chat with Chelsea Clinton about Wales, hiked to the Hollywood sign, revisited an eclectic San Franciscan 80s hotspot club called the Cat Club, am a writer for Life in the Bay and am training for my first Half Marathon.

Well my new millennial friends - who's calling me 90 now!

Waking up on my 40th - feeling healthy and loved. Nothing else matters.