Four Years

It was with some relief that I saw my Mum walk into the arrivals hall at San Francisco airport dressed as a snowman. Wanting to surprise the children she had originally suggested dressing as a super hero, so I had visions of her stepping off the plane wearing a black mask and being thrown to the ground by armed customs officers.

And so the post Christmas fun with my parents began!

Not only did she wear the outfit in the airport but my Mum and the children kept their costumes on for the journey home, waving at puzzled commuters on the 101.

We visited the city on the Caltrain and walked the GG bridge. On the way home the train stopped at our station but Tom refused to head to the doors and instead swung from the chairs singing his 'batman smells' song. It turns out that Caltrain doors don't automatically open if a small boy gets jammed in them. And that is why Tom almost went to San Jose on his own.

We visited the Cable Car Museum - not just a museum but the powerhouse for all the cables in the city, so you get to see the engines, winding wheels and sheaves working underground. Dad was in his element whilst we all pretended to understand what a stationary depression pulley does.

Taking advantage of the Welsh baby sitters (Frosty and Nanny Pete), Dan and I stayed in the city for a few days, being asked by people who assumed we were tourists which part of Australia we were from.

Watching the sun set over the city from the Top of the Mark

A date night which ended in Johnny Foley's dueling piano bar where I took to the stage to act out the lyrics to Adele's Hello and Bohemian Rhapsody (Lee Evans style). You know it's been a good night when a complete stranger pats you on the back as you leave and thanks you for being the entertainment. I woke up to a horrible feeling that I might be trending on You Tube.

Tomorrow is my 39th birthday. We moved here four years ago this week. Annie was three and Tom was a few months old. At the time Dan was doing a long daily commute into Visa's London office from our home of six years in Berkshire, and I was doing some fundraising consultancy having just had Tom. We lived 90 minutes from both sets of grandparents and had friends around us who we had known for years. Leaving our established life behind we stepped into unfamiliarity as soon as we got off the plane. I am thankful we only had a few weeks to decide about moving because if we had had longer to think about it we probably would have talked ourselves out of it!

A family photo taken in our back garden a few months before we moved when we had no idea that change was coming.

Coming to live a temporary life on a temporary basis means you have a care-free, curiosity driven attitude to your adventure. We made a list of all the things we wanted to do whilst we were here (we called it our San Frangriffco list and stuck it on our kitchen wall). Seeing the sun set over the city last week was the final item for me to tick off the list - a good metaphor for our life here as our fourth year draws to a close.

There is a novelty about a transitory life that after four years has its frustrations. We are living a permanent life in a temporary place which changes the focus of the curiosity fueled adventure. Rent increases ($400 more a month) in a place where we can't afford to buy, and compromised apartment living (neighbors who got a surround sound system for Christmas) emphasize the interim nature of our life. And then there's Dan's job. You might have heard a few media reports about the state of the governing body of football recently?

We spent the week of Christmas in Palm Springs staying at the La Quinta resort which is this lush 1920s hotel complex made up of hundreds of Spanish style villas (casitas) huddled together around pools and hot tubs. We were grateful for the hot tubs as the desert weather was surprisingly cold (it was warmer in the UK that week than in the Californian desert). I regretted not asking Santa for a warm fleece and wooly socks!

Christmas Eve at the hotel overlooking the Jack Nicklaus golf course with the Santa Rosa Mountains in the background. Whilst I was craving a Christmas rendition of the Pogues classic, our children are likely to grow up wanting to hear their favourite childhood Christmas Mexican song Feliz Navidad!

One of the 23 tennis courts at the resort, renowned for hosting many well known players and the site for the famous umpire fight between Annie and Tom Griffin 

Golf buggy-ing around the resort

Feliz Navidad prospero ano y Felicidad!

Throughout December we were involved in a project to collect new children's coats for charity. The disparity between the poor and wealthy in San Mateo County is stark, and when we heard about the cold El Nino California winter coming, and the number of families without money to buy warm coats for their children we decided to do something to help.

We called our campaign 'Giving the Gift of Christmas' and our wonderfully generous church congregation bought 120 children's coats! 

We partnered with Samaritan House, a local charity that provides shelter, food, medical care and clothing to families in need to bring some balance to the 'have' and 'have not' economy. 

In the past four years I've learned that being part of a community - which means being supported and supporting others - is the only real way to teach our children about the important transactions of life. 

Randomly, the day we took the coats to the charity, a worker there - who was Tongan - noticed my Welsh rugby shirt and told me his cousin Mama Molitika used to play rugby in Wales. It turns out he took him to the airport on the day he flew to the UK. An incredible coincidence since I worked for the club Mama went to play for and it was me who met him at the airport the other end!

Before my parents arrived with the Quality Street and Toblerone I was doing some regular running. This was at a 10k we did for a homeless charity - Home and Hope - on Remembrance weekend.

I ran a 10k on Thanksgiving morning - otherwise known as a Turkey Trot. I maintained a good speed by running with a much younger and fitter friend for as long as I could (for the first four miles, after which I gave her a breathless nod which indicated I am not in my twenties anymore). I finished in the top third of my age category which I was really happy about. One more year and I will be the youngest in my age category instead of the oldest!

We spent Thanksgiving with some Brits enjoying the BEST turkey dinner I have had for years, thankful above all else for good health and Pinot Noir.

Annie has joined a chess club and played in a tournament last November. Although the boy next to her in the photo doesn't seem to mind if he wins or loses, our daughter was a bit more competitive!

Annie ran her first 5k in October 

Tom is playing 'soccer' regularly

For four years this blog has been filled with comparisons between our old and new life because the experience of traveling lies in those differences, giving us a yardstick to reflect on how we might be changing through this experience. Having known and loved two places in the world called home there will never be one place to call home again - which enriches us but means we have to be adaptable to change in the future. 

I have no idea whether change will come in 2016. We've learned that change is only uncomfortable if you fear it; that leaning in to change is when a new experience begins, and the real wealth of life is in those experiences. And if change doesn't come this year, well...it's a pretty amazing part of the world to celebrate your 40th year of life!

The annual school photo - they are beauts!